Sitting In A Tree
by Captain Vulcan
Summary: Mamizou asks Nue is she content with her life in Gensokyou. One-shot.


Slice of Gensokyou Life. Please enjoy!

**STORY RATING: PG-13/T For Teens –** Slight innuendo and alcohol use.

**DISCLAIMER: **The Touhou Project is the rightful property of ZUN of Shanghai Alice. Its not mine. This is merely a written fiction from a fan that is based on his creation.

**TOUHOU PROJECT**

**SITTING IN A TREE**

It has been dull and uneventful to Nue Houjuu during the last few weeks. The same can be said about the rest of Gensokyou. It may be a Mecca for the supernatural and enchanted, but Gensokyou was downright boring sometimes! Both humans and youkai were enjoying themselves during the festivities at Myourenji today. Despite the the air of camaraderie among the visitors present at the moment, it didn't dispel the boredom that Nue was going through. It was peaceful.

Too peaceful...

How Nue wished she can swap lifestyles with the Hakurei Miko. Hell, she'd settle for that Moriya cub's livelihood right about now. With how often they have to deal with incident after incident around Gensokyou, she imagined that there's hardly a dull moment in their lives. Especially Sanae, she has to deal with two looney gods on a daily basis. They were the root of that poor girl's evil. What's worse, she was related to one of them. You definitely can't decide the people in your family.

Nue yawned and flexed all of her limbs. Her lifestyle at Myourenji was making her lethargic. While she did pay heed to the teachings of Byakuren along with teaching Kogasa on how to be a good spook, she was getting soft. Nue was growing weaker with her life here. She wasn't completely content with her life in here in Myourenji. Where Nue came from, only the strong survive. In her heyday, a moment of weakness could lead to a lifetime of trouble and surrender. It could even lead to a quick death.

She is now a peace-loving youkai. She hate what she had became.

"Hey, Nue-chan," chirped Kogasa as her upside-down face suddenly invaded Nue's eyesight. "Surprised?"

Nue wasn't impressed nor amused. "Tch. I'll be more surprised if a bear wiped his ass with a fluffy white rabbit after taking a dump in the woods."

Kogasa's eyebrows became check-marks. "That's... an awfully messed up thing to say."

"Sorry kid, but I'm telling ya how it is," the nue deadpanned as she crossed her lithe legs. "Besides, aren't you still playing hide and seek with the kids down there?"

"Yep. They still have yet to find me," Kogasa grinned, proud for eluding pubescent children for nearly an hour. "I'm good!"

"If you say so. I mean, none of them don't know how to fly yet, let along climbing tall trees." Nue pointed out, causing her heterochromatic friend to blush. "That's one heck of a handicap you've imposed on them."

"You're mean, Nue-chan," Kogasa remarked as gravity was now affecting her inverted skirt. Flashing her undefined friend wasn't her intention. She somersaulted in midair and stood on a neighboring tree branch. "Why are always you like that? What made you this way?"

"I've been a sarcastic bitch for as long as I can remember," Nue revealed. "I had to be. Have you ever heard the saying 'I must laugh to keep from crying'? It may sound weird, but back in the days that was my life in a nutshell."

Kogasa tilted her head. "Oh..."

"What is it?"

"You're awfully nonchalant about things, Nue. Yet, you're cool." Kogasa replied with a warm smile. "Its one of the reasons why I look up to you. You're like a big sister to me."

"Hmm! Some role-model I am," Nue remarked while propping her head on the tree. She suddenly swept her gaze to the ground. "Speaking of role-models, guess who found your hiding spot?"

"Huh?" Kogasa followed the nue's attention and spotted a group of human children gathered around their tree. "D'oh!"

"WE FOUND YOU!" The brats chorused.

"Okay, I have to give it to you guys, you all did well." Kogasa admitted approvingly as she returned to the ground. "That was a bit of a surprise."

"This time we go into hiding!" One of the boys exclaimed.

"Yea, Koga-chan!" A girl followed. "Let's see if you can find us!"

The karakasa smirked at the challenge. "Alright then! You're on!"

The children and the karakasa ran off in joyous laughter as they prepared for another round of hide & seek. Nue didn't quite understand her friend's fascination with humans. For someone who's sole purpose is to frighten humans, Kogasa loved to play with them. Maybe Kogasa wants to tell them a couple of ghost stories once they're done with play-time? Kogasa affinity to them was an apparent contradiction (which made sense in a place that is not bound by common sense).

Nue smirked. _Maybe I'll assume a frightening form once Kogasa decides to tell ghost stories. Hell, I can scare those brats right along with her! _"Hmm! Fufufufu..."

"Oh dear," a nearby voice snapped the nue out of her mischievous musings. "I'd thought I heard a masculine voice up here."

"I do not sound masculine!" Nue scowled, surprised by the sudden appearance of her old friend. "My voice's just... overwhelmingly dulcet, Mamizou."

The tanuki trickster took a spot on a neighboring branch and grinned at the undefined girl. "Rrrright... Tony Braxton, Paola Ruiz, Yuu Kobayashi, and Mitsuki Saiga have overwhelmingly dulcet voices. You on the other hand sound like a hot blooded boy."

"I do not!"

"Your voice's a pretty big contrast to your lithe build and girlish good looks, Nue-tan." Mamizou joked.

"Ugh. Drop the subject already!" Nue grunted. "What do you want, anyway?"

Mamizou gave her friend a sly grin. "Umm-hmm! I sorta noticed that you were looking blue up here. The brooding look on your face is a dead giveaway. Something's on your mind, isn't it?" She took a swig of alcohol out of her drinking gourd. "Ahh! There's nothing like muroka sake. Beats the heck outta the filtered stuff that are sold at the convenience stores."

Nue surveyed her friend while she indulged in her drink. "You... gained weight, Mamizou."

"Eh?" Mamizou looked down at her chest for a moment. "Well, I'll be damned. It seems that I did put on a few centimeters recently. Whoever said that alcohol is good for making your bust bigger sure wasn't lying. I'm already a D-Cup as it is."

A tinge of envy hit Nue. "Enjoy your back pains then..."

"Don't worry, Nue-tan. I'm a tanuki," Mamizou beamed. "I'm sure that I can take it."

"Only time will tell..."

"Speaking of time, how do you like living here at Myourenji?" Mamizou suddenly inquired. "You've been here for almost two years, right?"

Nue crossed her legs. "Hmm? I really can't complain. It's my home."

"Is that a fact?" Mamizou produced a sardonic expression. "Word from a certain mortal god says that you downright despise Kyouko and your relationships with Murasa, Nazrin, and Shou are still guarded. Don't tell me that you've become a tsundere?"

"Friends close," the nue held a disgusted expression for a moment. The svelte sphinx was a firm believer in the old saying 'Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer'."Don't believe a word of what that crazy green-haired broad says. All her screws are loose."

The tanuki didn't want to tell her friend that Sanae's words held water. Even Byakuren said that the nue was a little troublesome sometimes. Kyouko and Nue argued on a daily basis, and she sometimes fought with the other girls. "Eh? Nazrin said that you once knocked her out and left her for dead at the bottom of a cliff last year."

That hilarious memory brought a smile to Nue's face. "Ha ha! That rat told you about that? Girl, that's a day that will forever live in infamy!" She cracked her knuckles. "I savored that ass-whuppin'!" The reason why the said recollection was funny because an angry Nazrin promised to leave Nue in a place where even she couldn't find her once she was done with her. Too bad the mouse couldn't keep her word.

"Beating the heck out of one of your friends? That's a paddling." Mamizou referenced.

"More like, beating the heck outta a frienemy," the nue retorted.

You're still in that mindset, I see." Mamizou mentioned with a hint of sadness. Her ears flapped and she said "Some things never change... even though they should."

"That's the way it is, Mamizou."

"Nue, this world presents a new life for you – a second chance," Mamizou reasoned, allowing her tail to hang of the branch she was sitting on. "The past is the past. Move forward. Father Time only moves forward and I really think you should follow the example. With your way of thinking, you're going to be hard-pressed to know that you lived all your life as a vain individual while relishing your glory days. You don't wanna be an old maid, do you? Honor your past, but don't live in it. It's not good for you."

The tanuki's word brought consternation upon Nue. "Well, what about you then? Don't you ever wish that you can relive your days back in the Heian Era? Don't lie to me, Mamizou. I know you've enjoyed those days that nobody dared to mess with you."

Mamizou adjusted her prince-nez glasses. "Yea... you're right. I'll be lying if I told you that I don't honor those memories. But don't get me wrong, I'm still alive. I'll see to it that I'll have fun in this land during the years to come. Gensokyou's a pretty fascinating place and I'll be sure to live my life to the fullest until the day I take that great dirt nap. Permanently."

Nue smirked despite herself. "You talk too much..."

"Wrong. You just don't talk enough," Mamizou laughed. "I guess that's how we became close friends in the first place. Opposites attract – I'm the Bonnie to your Clyde."

"Heh. That's rich, I should be Bonnie," Nue remarked. "I'm the more feminine of this duo. You wouldn't believe how many compliments I receive about my ass."

"Bah! You're Clyde, Nue-tan. It's easy to mistake you for a guy by the sound of your voice."

"Cow-tits!"

"Bubble buns!"

"More cushioning for me, then!"

"Can't say the same about your chest area!"

Nue was about to make a another retort but she suddenly snorted. "Pfft! Heh... heh... heh..." Her head suddenly shot backwards as she burst out in wicked laughter (and scaring the birds and a few macaque monkeys out of the trees in the process). "YAH-HAHAHAHAHA!"

Nue's black laughter kinda caught Mamizou off guard. "Gosh, I do think that you hit the back of your head against the tree too hard just now..."

Nue wrapped her arms around her lithe form. "I... haha... heh he-he-he!... Hahahahaha!"

Mamizou frowned in annoyance. "Don't hurt yourself, Nue-tan."

The undefined girl drained the dark mirth out of her system. "Heh... I can't help but notice the irony in this."

The tanuki's interests were piqued. "Oh? Tell me more..."

"Weren't you the one that said to 'move forward' in life just now?" Nue's statement caused her friend's ears to twitch in curiosity. "True, some things never change. We're joking on each other as always. Which is part of our friendship. You're sure you wanna move ahead from this point?"

Mamizou stared at Nue with wide eyes and a blushing face. What her mysterious friend said just now can be interpreted in many different ways. What was Nue trying to say? "Nue-tan!" Mamizou gasped. "Surely you don't mean what I think you're meaning..."

"Of course, it's fun to clown around with you, Mamio." Nue shrugged her small shoulders. "It's one of the reasons our camaraderie lasted this long in the first place." Innocent curiosity gathered on her expression. "What did you think I meant?"

The tanuki's mouth hung open.

"Close your yap or talk, Mamio."

"Oh..." Mamizou deflated in disappointment. "Yea, you're right. Friends forever!" She cheered and suddenly realized a pet-peeve of hers. "Hey, didn't you called me Mamio just now?"

Nue snapped her fingers in defeat. "Dang! And I almost got away with it, too."

The tanuki shot too her feet in hot choler "Nue! Don't you know how much I hate it when people call me that, ya little cockroach! ?"

Nue mimicked her buddy's anger, her body rigid at the insult. "Hey! Hey! Hey! What your mouth! I'm a nue, not a roach youkai!"

While the friends argued, Rinnosuke approached the temple with a few books in tow. He promised that he would visit the temple in to deliver those books to Byakuren. However, he overhead bickering voices up in the trees above him. What the half-youkai saw caused him to smile blissfully. Nue was wearing a thin pair of side-tie panties...

_**DOING!**_

Rinnosuke looked down and sighed in relief. It'll take more than a panty-shot to get him aroused (or so he thought).

"Huh?" Mamizou wondered, searching for the source of the peculiar sound.

_**DOING!**_

"What the heck is that noise?" Nue grunted, oblivious to the fact that Rinnosuke could see up her skirt.

_**DOING!**_

"Oh, darn it!" Hatate swore, as she sprouted from her hiding spot from a nearby tree. "Someone just had to call me at a time like this. And this ring-tone is, like, just plain weird!"

"Aha! That's more like it!" Aya appeared from another neighboring tree. "You've just given me a great scoop, Hata-tan! Who would have ever thought that you were into such lewd sounds?"

The younger tengu frowned in annoyance. "Ugh! Whatever!"

Rinnosuke decided that now would be wise to go on about his own business. Its best for Nue to remain in the dark about the glorious sight that made his day...

Nue rolled her eyes. "False alarm. Its just a duo of pigeons being nosy. Anyway, I'm heading back inside. I'm hungry." She hopped off the tree and hovered.

"Nue, wait. What about the little cutie that was here moments ago?" Mamizou wondered. "The one that ran off with the children. Are they going to be okay?"

Nue shrugged. "Meh. I'm sure the kids are fine," the chimera relayed nonchalantly. "In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if those cubs are having a ball right about now."

"Hmm... if you say so." Mamizou remarked uncertainly. She was actually more concerned for Kogasa's safety.

**EXTRA**

**BLOMP!**

"Argh! That hurts!"

**BLOMP!**

"Stop that, you little demons!" Kogasa demanded with glossy eyes. She was bound to a tree by an enchanted rope. The children were throwing various balls at her. A football slammed into her chest. "Eeeeiii! That weird ball with the sharp corners especially hurt!"

"That's what you get for scaring us!" A boy laughed, tossing a soccer ball (and missed).

"Yea! Serves you right, ya big meanie!" A teenaged girl condemned as she chucked a volleyball at Kogasa's face.

**BLOMP!**

"Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!" Kogasa whined.

"Now now... you're definitely not in any position to make such a demand," a (heinous) voice cooed from the shadows. Kogasa can make out the sight of a curvy and seemingly tall figure behind the children. "Besides, you didn't stop trying to scare them once they entered deep in the woods. Why should they stop doing what they're doing now that the tables are turned?"

"Uuu~!" Kogasa moaned. "I'm sorry!"

"Yea right," A girl snorted and tossed a softball at the youkai's crotch.

**DING!**

"Gyah! My cooch!" Kogasa's thighs were bound together in immense pain. "Those things are called softballs! ?"

"Whoa! That's a little too harsh, Hidaka-chan." Sanae said as she appeared out of the shadows. "Take it easy!"

"Ah... ugh! Oooohhh..." Kogasa gasped, doubled over from the fresh pain. "I'm... sorry! I'm really sorry for what I did! Will you all forgive me! ?"

The deranged shrine maiden hid her evil smile behind her gohei. "Oh ho ho! We're not done with you yet, my beautiful Kogasa. This is a tee-for-tat type of party, after all. This time, it's their turn in scaring you and I'm going to help them."

Kogasa dreaded the worst. The wrath of a gang of village kids was the last thing on her mind right now. Thanks to the intervention of a partially divine bitch, this situation has gotten lethal. "Byakuren-sama will hear my screams," she ranted.

"I'm counting on it," the grin on Sanae's face seemed more sinister now. "I'm sure that she does not condone terrifying children, either. You're pretty much boinked either way, toots!"

The karakasa accepted her fate. "I should have known that something of this nature will happen in this story."

An awkward silence fell...

The confusion on children and Sanae's face was priceless.

"That... doesn't..." stammered the Moriya priestess before recomposing her mischief. "Grr! Don't try to confuse us now!"

Kogasa hung her head. "Sorry."

"Silence! Your punishment is at hand!" Sanae suddenly yelled. "The time has come for us to do our pagan ritual of summoning a storm god who's going through menopause!" The children suddenly donned on frog and snake masks. "Now, let us commence our rain dance!"

Poor Kogasa was downright terrified now. She heard rumors recently, but she didn't know that they were true. Kanako WAS going through that phase (on a divine level) and if she gets summoned here then there's no doubt that Kogasa's in deep trouble. Sanae began her spiritual dance and the children followed suit. All Kogasa could do now was pray...

_'Umm, Suwako-sama! My name's Kogasa Tatara,' _Kogasa began. _'I know it's been a while since I've last did this...'_

**THE END**

Thanks again, Achariyth1.


End file.
